Best Day Ever.

Umm, today was the best New York day ever! Sometimes I like to pretend I am a celebrity with no bills or rent to pay, and today was the perfect day to practice this ridiculous fantasty. First, I have a teeny part on this tv show called "Life on Mars" tomorrow and I had a costume fitting today. Costume fittings are dreamy! I went to this Studio in Queens and they found outfits for me that look like 1973, and then I would come out in these circa 1973 dresses and the wardrobe team was all "You look amazing!" and "That dress looks like it was made for you!" I told them that I was going to start coming up to visit them every day just for the self-esteem boost.
Then, I went to a meeting for this startup magazine I am going to be helping out with. And the other people there were all, "Is this a pyramid scheme?" because we had all applied via Craig's List and supposedly made it to the "3rd stage" i.e. the personal interview/orientation, but this online mag may be the real deal. After hearing the owner talk about it, I am excited about upcoming projects. So be looking for some links to articles at an actual up-and-coming "e-zine" over the next couple of months!
Our amazing New York friend, who shall remain unnamed, was able to get us into this party for the opening of Tiger Woods new video game, the Tiger Woods PGA Tour '09! This place was like the best wedding matched with the best christmas and the biggest barmitzvah all rolled into one. We had "gold wristbands" which was apparently special, and Sam and I sipped on cocktails from the free open bar next to Tiger, who has really nice skin. Michael Phelps was supposedly there too, but we just missed him. There were all these video game stations and mounds of sushi and macadamia nuts, which I grabbed a handful of every time I walked by. And also the guy from Transformers was there, the one who is the computer expert who the Australian lady goes to for help, and he eats all the doughnuts and says, "I'm not going to jail for you!" All in all it was magic. And Sam and I each got a copy of the game (I'm still trying to figure out what to do with my copy since we obviously don't need two..)

New Slang

New Yorkers say awesome things and confusing things. There's just little differences that sometimes make me cock my head and give the "huh" face. I find myself fascinated by the tidbits of dialogue I've been picking up from all these Yanks up here. What's even more fascinating is when I find myself using those words without a second thought like some kind of linguistic chameleon. I figured I'd share a few of my favorites. Bearing in mind that I don't or can't use all of these phrasings, they're still quite rad. Yes I said rad.

1) "What's good?" - As far as I can gather, this is a variation of "What's up?". Sometimes used as a phone greeting, or to ask someone what's going on with something. It can be modified in several ways such as "What's really good?", "What's goody?" or my favorite "What's goodingtons?"

2) "On line" - New Yorkers don't stand "In Line" they stand "On line" apparently. I don't get it either. It makes it extra confusing when you are at Petco trying to buy a squeaky ball for your dog and you're texting your wife. You would classify yourself as "In Line". Then a gal comes up and says "Are you online?" You look at your phone and then wonder why this girl cares about that and you respond "Nope." Then she cuts in front of you and buys her dog food, leaving you to curse about how rude that was. (Later I realized, she meant to ask was I in line. Silly Yanks.)

3) Cross streets - It's no longer valid to just give an address. You have to give the cross streets when you're ordering late night sushi or trying to get a cabbie to get you somewhere. For example, Barrio Chino, a great little hole in the wall restaurant in the Lower East Side is at 253 Broome Street. But someone's gonna ask you what the cross streets are, and you gotta know that it's between Orchard and Ludlow.

4) Strunzo - I believe this is Italian. It means "Piece of shit". So when someone annoys you, you can affectionately refer to them as a "Strunzo" or you can mix it up and modify it. Like "Look what that Strunz did" or "This place is like Stunzylvania today."

5) Official Tissue - I don't know many people who use this one, but I think it's so ridiculous that I had to comment on it. From what I gather, it means "legit, cool, top-notch". Like "The new iPhone is official tissue, son." Or "My flatscreen LCD is official tissue."

6) Pal - If I've adopted any wordage since I've been up here, I've adopted "pal." I find "pal" to be the most hilarious adaptable word yet and I've taken full advantage of it. I never used to use Pal, I'd instead sub "dude, brother, friendo" but now, pal is it.

7) Scumbag - I'm glad this one resurfaced. I don't know that I've ever used "scumbag" before I got up here but it really fits the bill on occasion why you want to insult someone and don't feel like swearing. It also allows you to ration your use of strunzo.

That's all I've got for now. Hopefully next time I'll be full of more new and exciting words to share.